Validation is defined as “the action of checking or proving the validity or accuracy of something”. To validate a person is to say they they or something that they did is good or right. Validation wraps a shivering body in warmth and light. Who wouldn’t want that? Imagine never hearing the words “I’m proud of you” or a simple “good job”.
Believe it or not, the things that people tell you often heavily shape who we are. We are raised under the ideas of wrong and right, good and bad. Typically, you want to be on the good and right side of things. But how do you know if you are? Somebody or something tells you. Let’s say you turned in a test but never got a grade. You would have no idea how you did. Of course, you could say, “ I think I did well,” but nobody likes someone with an ego.
There are children who are starved when it comes to validation from their parents. Naturally, they search for that validation in other people. Like a beast that can’t be satisfied, they act out or maybe they act right, anything to get some kind of attention. Some people are hungrier than others; you might know them as the “Teacher’s Pet”. Other people who don’t receive validation try to ignore their hunger by acting out. This could be your standard middle-school bully.
Everyone, including myself, craves Validation in one way or another. We want to hear someone tell us that what we are doing is right; that what we are doing is “good enough”. Like it or not, there is at least a small fraction of every person who cares what others think about them; it’s only human. Our need for validation can drive us to do things good and bad. However, wanting to be validated isn’t always bad; to be validated is to know that you are on the right path, and it comforts us with the feeling of knowing that we will get where we need to go in the end.